the world gives us chances here and there to take a step back and breathe, even if it might be an unwelcome guest. the past month has been a series, no, an entire flood of time that just stopped. and i didn’t want it to. because i spent the past year just breathing, just thinking, just relighting my candle because i knew it was burnt out after the toxic fumes i was forced to inhale. and i was proud of myself for walking instead of sprinting through my day to day, for knowing that what i needed to do was remember and reflect, not distract myself to move on. but here i am again, in the same situation i was in one year ago. but it’s different now, because it’s not by choice, because now the only thing i want to do is go back to when i was jogging through the streets of life and searching for laughter and busywork instead of being jailed in my own cage.
but it’s not so bad.
at least now, i can look back at what used to be, what will be once more, and smile. at least now, i can rest my soul and focus on the hobbies i forgot, that i was once passionate about, and take a step every once in awhile at my own pace without having to worry about what they see, what you see, even what i see. because i missed the feeling of being solitude while i was running away from it. because now, i’m remembering what it’s like to be able to give emotionally, not just hide behind gifts in an attempt to show my care. because even if i’m not able to do some things i want to, i’m able to see the other plants in my garden i neglected with the excuse that i was fatigued, busy, just. done.
and it’s not necessarily a pause button right now, even if it looks like it.
it can be anything you make it to be.
just remember,
[fill in the blank]
Yooni:
“Hi, my name is Yooni, and I'm in the Class of 2023! I've loved poetry since I first started writing it in middle school. I've been admittedly pretty out of touch with it recently, but I thought that since I had the time, I might as well start again. I decided to write prose regarding my feelings about being in quarantine. Even though I've never written prose before, I wanted to try something new.”
Harvard ‘23 |instagram @im.yoonique | snapchat: @ypark926
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